An oblivious Mind and emotional Cloud

I am not very emotionally open as a person. I struggle to express my affection and I keep my guards up. Many see this as a sign of disinterest, an embodiment of my emotional distance. Truthfully, it would be unfair to deflect the blame to others being unable to understand and empathise with my wreck of a brain. It all is purely on me, and me alone.

A string of events that had happened these past few days had me pondering on the many ways for people to express their loves. I value quality time the most out of the five love languages; I show love by spending time with the person. However, I've come to realise that to some, this doesn't register as my way of showing affection. No one's fault, obviously. Sometimes my clueless self also fails to pick up expressions of affection from my dearests.

I was talking with a friend about the love language. Funny timing actually, I've been writing this blog post about love language and it was so happened that our conversation drifted to this topic. We had a similar love language, so the conversation went with us agreeing that quality time is very important. Not useful to help solve my current quandary, but it made me question whether love expressions can be boxed into five distinct categories.

Ah, enough with self-absorbed babbles.

I don't know where I'm going with this post. I guess this post is simply an outlet for me to purge all these jumbled thoughts clouding my mind and try to see the situation with a clearer head. Is it a punishable sin not knowing what one did wrong when there was never any ill intention? I guess everything indeed has two sides to it. Until the wronged, whose friendship I cherish and company I treasure, decides to finally enlighten me of my wrongdoings, I can only wait.

And boy, I will.